I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
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We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
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Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.