The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
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