Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize