please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
