well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
and she was petting her beer can
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
