I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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