What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
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