Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize