She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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