Do you still have your period?
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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