I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
tell me about the eggs
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