apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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