Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Porn is love you can see.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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