She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
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