in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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