i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
How external is "for external use only"?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.