Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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