I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Even my vagina gasped.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize