Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
