Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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