I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
where am i from again
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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