I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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