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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having

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• (951): View more from California

  Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick

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• (315): View more from New York

  dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.

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• (904): View more from Florida

  I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse

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