All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
