she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
