walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
