its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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