kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
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I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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