Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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