4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK