It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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