I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
