i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley