I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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