So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
