foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
she smelled like a LAN party
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
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so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
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we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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