He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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