My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie