This girl is more easily done than said...
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf