after a month anything with tits is on the radar
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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