you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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