What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize