his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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