I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize