Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
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