And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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