He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
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