You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
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he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
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Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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