just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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