yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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